Fully Graduated? - 2 years (May 15)

It's official. My retention time at the orthodontist is no more (Well checkups when needed), and I have a certificate to show it, being a member of the order of "Happy Faces". Thank you to Dr. Sue-Lynn Chin, Dr. Martin Chin, and all of their staff for being so accommodating and helpful throughout the process. Looks like I'm on "Demand Recall" meaning that I only need to go in to get my retainer fixed or replaced, since I should be wearing it daily...

This is now over 2 years in the making, and I would like to thank all of you for your support throughout this entire process. On a side note, I have also graduated from Science Kinesiology at McMaster University, so that diploma should be coming in soon as well! Now onto the teeth/jaw stuff you all came here for. Let's start with a little close up.

I can guarantee you with a smile like this thanks to a fitted bite from jaw surgery and aligned teeth from braces,  you will brush and floss like it's part of your survival. I honestly never used to floss often, but I floss daily to 4x a week because it's a shame to see a tasty piece of meat get in the way of the shine coming off these pearls. Might be a bit much of an ego stroke but I've earned it... I know you all will take good care of your teeth at ALL STAGES of jaw surgery/braces/before/after so I'm not worried.

The only issue I have at this stage is that my nerves STILL aren't fully back, but they do tickle when I brush my finger over the area. Is this really an issue? When you have it for so long I barely even notice it, so no. Even if it improved a bit I don't even know if it would make any sort of impact. 

Some tips for teeth care:

- Drink lots of water to keep your mouth clean, your blood flowing, and healthy gums.
- Gum is a great treat post-meals to clean your teeth. Also, it increases stomach acids which can support digestion of the huge meal you just ate.
- Just a warning, I've asked several professionals and those 'whitening gums' don't do jack. The contact time that your teeth have with the active ingredient isn't enough to truly whiten your teeth, so I would not pay the extra cents to get that kind of gum or believe it is doing anything for you. 
- Brushing your teeth immediately after consuming something acidic/right after a meal is slightly harmful to your teeth. Acids make the tooth enamel soft, and the contact from a toothbrush might do some damage. Wait a few minutes, and if you're in a tight squeeze just have some gum instead!
- Eat healthy, consume vitamin C tablets (or just drink juice, eat foods with it) and plenty of vegetables, exercise as often as possible, and your teeth will reflect your good health!

Once again, best of luck to anyone going through this process. There's so much support for you via family, friends, and an excellent and informed online community!

Game Over. I win. - Day 439 (July 19)

50th post.... and they are freaking off.

No visible squares!

This post will be more about braces than anything else, because jaw surgery is pretty much a thing of the past! I got my braces off on July 19, and I've been high on life for the past 20 hours. Once you hit this point, smiling is contagious. Harmful, actually. So harmful that I don't know how I avoided a car accident on the way home since I was checking out my teeth in the rearview mirror for 60% of the drive back. The feeling is amazing. Why? Because I've finally finished my jaw surgery career, going from http://doublejawfix.blogspot.ca/2011/04/whats-cracking-first-post.html in my very first post to where I am now, 2 years later. I've learned so much from this experience, got in contact with a supportive community online, and it has been a thrill. You could say that having an underbite is a good thing because meeting people in the same boat who are just as eager as you makes for a great team. Thanks to every one of you, it would not have been possible to keep up the motivation without you all! :D

The effects of no more braces?

- I've been giving the analogy of having an orange peel in your mouth for a few minutes that is now taken out. Multiply that x 200.
- I instinctively pick my teeth as if there is food stuck under the bracket where my hook is. Nothing is there! It's like a 'ghost limb' effect, and it's playing with my mind.
- I forcefully use liquids to wash food out of my teeth as if there is food there. Once again, nothing.
- The enamel is probably coming off my front teeth based on the amount of times I have rubbed them.
- I can see my teeth and they are actually white! It pays off to constantly brush your teeth, and with braces this means a bit more attention is needed after eating a meal. Make sure all of the food gets out once you've finished a meal or else that little piece of meat is sitting there for who knows how long.
- Chewed gum without fear of having to keep it all in one piece so it doesn't separate on my hooks. It's marvelous.


What are my plans now?

- Teeth whitening. A combination of white strips and toothpaste using the Crest 3D Advanced brand has been recommended to me. I've read that white strips help make teeth white quickly. The toothpaste however, not so much since the contact between peroxide/whitening and your teeth is so little. The toothpaste is more to maintain the whiteness that the 2-3 week program gives you. I think the combination will probably give teeth its full white potential.
- I will make one more youtube video and post it here on this site. My laptop has been in the shop for weeks and once I get it back I will get it done!

To those of you reading with braces, please don't feel like I'm rubbing it in your face. Please understand that to feel this state of Nirvana means fully going through the whole process from start to finish and always holding strong. This whole process has been 2 years of braces, and one summer of jaw surgery recovery. Whatever your situation may be, as long as you follow through, the amount of relief and satisfaction is truly worth it. I can't stress enough how important that is before you feel like your smile is a million bucks.

It's a new beginning, and this process has made me ready.

Last post before braces off!! - Day 411 (June 22)

Where have I been? 

I've spent the first 3 weeks of my summer in Europe. 3 friends and I traveled to: Paris, Barcelona, Cinque Terra, Florence, Salzburg, Munich, Berlin, and Amsterdam over the course of 21 days, knocking off everything a city had to offer in 3 days or less. Backpacking and living in hostels was a crazy experience and I would certainly do it again. I wore my elastics too like a good boy.

A view on top of the Arc de Triomphe

I'm taking summer school from mondays to wednesdays and on thursdays I am studying for the Dental Admissions Test in a Kaplan prep course. Time with braces has certainly been an afterthought to life.


A day with my jaw surgeon

I had the opportunity to shadow my oral surgeon last friday, and it was a lot of fun. I did not get to see surgeries, but I did manage to be present for 5-6 wisdom teeth removals and 2 patient's teeth extractions. Dr. Tocchio and his staff are very friendly and they made it very comfortable. It was nice to see what goes on from another point of view other than the chair!

Orthodontist

I went into the ortho on June 12. As he told me, I'm getting my braces off in July! The office is going to call me to fit a date in during the week of the 9th-13th, and I will get them removed! 2 days after it is required to come in and get molds, and fitted for a retainer.  I was given a small wire that's placed on my bottom 5 teeth in preparation. Here's the current state of my teeth:

As you can see everything is lined up. On the right side there is a small gap, but when braces come off, this may be difficult to imagine, but your teeth tend to slowly cave in, as the bottom and top rows of teeth angle inwards.

Once my braces are off I'll take a few pictures, create a video on youtube and that would be the completion of my jaw journey! 2 years flies by fast.

Awaiting the Braces Off Celebration - Day 333 (April 5)

 I just spent a good 2 minutes trying to figure out how long it has been since surgery. I counted 333 days. Time has certainly flown by, and so much has passed without an afterthought. In addition to school, I have traveled to New Orleans for Habitat for Humanity to help build houses during Mardi Gras, wrote my dental aptitude test in February, and decided to take another year of undergraduate studies. The only issue I have is the fact that I have braces. I've taken grad photos, and just last weekend I had a Kinesiology formal and flashed the metal everywhere. It was such a good time with a limo, banquet dinner, and open bar that it wasn't an issue.

Where's my progress right now? My bite is lining up very nicely, and my bottom row needs to be narrowed. My teeth are straight and there are no gaps. I just saw the orthodontist, he bent the wire inwards and it went back inside. Of course I asked for a date and I got July. July. Just as scheduled so I cannot really complain. All I can do is wear elastics 24/7. I found out that the point of elastics is to pull the teeth together so that they are always biting together to angle both top and bottom jaw inwards. Just a little tidbit. Here is what my bag of elastics look like. They are 5/16" (7.9mm) and light(2.5oz)

Last Surgeon appt - Jan 7 (Day 244)

Happy New Year to everybody and Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays etc. I hope everyone enjoyed their time with their families, I got the chance to do so with my family in Florida, it was great. The weather was at a good 25-28 Celsius and beach time was a given. I just had an ortho appointment and jaw surgeon appointment a few hours apart from each other and here's the quick update.

Ortho - Braces on schedule to be removed in the summer still. He added 2 chains that are 10 teeth across on my bottom and my top teeth. These are meant to squeeze the teeth together and remove gaps between the teeth, and I'm actually feeling a bit of pain from them(that's a first for me.) I'm still using elastics 24/7 to pull the lower jaw back a bit, so I twist them like crazy to increase the tension.

Jaw Surgeon - It was my last appointment with my surgeon! It was far more anticlimactic than thought, primarily because it was another short 2 minute appointment, and on a Friday afternoon where my surgeon was an hour from closing. He basically said the braces have a little more to go, and the bite looks great! It was good to hear that. However, this wasn't going to be the last time I saw him. Since I am applying to dentistry school within 2 years, he agreed to let me shadow him for a day, which is amazing. So I'm going to see him again in March or so.

What's left? - I do indeed still have numbing on the same place on my left chin. It doesn't stress me however and I live life normally. I could probably never heal from this and still not be bothered. However, during our New year's dinner, my cousins let me keep a straggling piece of broccoli on my chin for a good half hour. My uncle came by and said, "Didn't anyone tell you that you have food on your chin?" To which my brother replied that we should take family photos without me knowing. I hope this doesn't happen during really important dinners in my future.

My teeth look real straight and I've become real confident with my smile, and will be more confident once the metal is removed.

Update Video, Elastics, again - Day 190 (Nov 14)

Basically another ortho appointment update.

My teeth are all straight, but the general orientation of my jaw still has to change, and it is the reason for having braces so much later past my surgery. This past Friday my ortho had me back on elastics to pull my lower jaw back to create an overbite(sorry I had originally said underbite). Why he is doing this just now is kind of frustrating in my opinion. I'm supposed to wear them whenever I can, and take them off to brush and eat. One thing about wearing these elastics is that they are super loose. The ortho assistant suggested that I twist them to put more tension in. I think it's a great idea and am going to tighten these pretty well. Lastly I just made a quick update video to show where I am at.

The Chapstick Test - Day 160 (Oct 15)

This surgery makes you notice the weirdest things. For example,  if you haven't heard of Epic Meal Time, take a look at their videos.

All I can think of is, "How dangerous is it to have your jaw open that wide?"  Is that weird? I'm still fairly conscious when I eat to not open too wide and put pressure down. My bone is probably fully healed for the most part too. It's going to take some time to unlearn that feeling.

Surgeon/Ortho update

I also am worrying in the back of my mind about my numbness. It's about 5 months and I'm still really numb on my left side. My surgeon used this little tool and tapped my left side of my lips and I felt very little sensation, and then when he tapped my right side I got a crazy poking pain. Big difference on one side than the other, and he just assured me that it's going to take time. Okay. I saw my ortho and just got different wires again. My top row teeth are starting to open up a little bit, so the wires are going to fix that.

I've also noticed my top teeth and bottom teeth don't exactly line up nicely. OP told me that perhaps there's this issue where the size of my teeth are pretty big and therefore it creates a different orientation for my teeth. Something to live with.

I notice the feeling come back to me randomly at times when I'm walking to class. It's best described as: Walking into a spider web and it landing on your chin. It's there and annoying, but you just touch it and realize there is no spider web, just your dumb chin.

Lastly, I put on chapstick for the first time today(I usually just use hand cream) and whoa, it feels really weird. I recommend trying it and seeing what spots on your lips you can feel. This is probably my new way of checking where I'm at and keeping the lips not dry haha. Try the Chapstick Test!

The Waiting Game - October 5 (Day 150)

School is in full swing right now and things have been pretty hectic. Here are some updates at day 150(yeah, day freaking 150.)

Status of the jaw itself
- Still numb in places. My left side of my chin(where more asymmetry was fixed) definitely still has a deadness to it compared to my right. Good news is that when I touch it at different angles, the sensation is indescribable, I'd say it's most compared to knocking your funny bone on the elbow.
- Other parts that are numb include both sides on the cheeks under the eyes, compared to my left chin it's nothing
- My upper lip/middle part of the nose(the part that splits your 2 nose holes, I have no idea what that's called) tingles when touched.
- In summary, this has been my numbing situation for quite a while and it seems like it will take some time go away.
- Eating has been excellent, my stomach is still quite shrunken and is taking some time to increase. I can chew pretty much everything, but I am always really conscious when I bite into crunchier things. No, eating is not perfect yet and I'm roughly 5 months in.


The Orthodontist trip 

Now I went to the orthodontist a while back(2 weeks ago) and was basically given bad news. My teeth are perfectly straight. However, there is still some alignment to do. I popped the question. "How much longer do I need braces for?" The answer - "Until summer."      ****!

They say that they can only move my teeth at a certain speed so that the bones can calcify accordingly. I don't really have an opinion on that, but I know that every time I get a new wire I don't get any soreness or barely any indication that much more movement is needed. So, it's basically a waiting game. It also sucks that I'm in 4th year university rocking braces but it could be worse. Keep calm and carry on. Right? Right?

Meeting old friends

It's been, just, weird. I get weird looks almost everyone that I reintroduce myself to. I didn't think I'd have to refer to my jaw surgery so many times but usually that's been the case. It's either: new braces? new haircut? skinnier? taller? younger? Why are you different? They've all been weird. People I've met this year obviously don't have that and therefore it has been somewhat refreshing. I feel like this whole journey has started a new chapter in my life. Coming out of surgery I've lost a lot of my cockiness and have been somewhat humbled. Warning: Lots of time to self-reflect when sitting in a reclining chair may do that to you. I feel like a new person. Much more laid back than I was before. Weird.

Anyhow here's a picture. I plan on doing a video at the 6 month mark.

Surgeon appt update - Day 120 (Sept 5)

I feel terrible because I haven't really kept up with the blog, and I'm posting to show that yes I am still alive. I'm an RA in residence this year so the past 2 weeks I've been at Uni prepping and it's been tiresome.

My latest focus has been my weight rather than recovery at this stage. It's been good and bad.

1. I pulled out my scale that I used pre-surgery when I was at uni. I had last registered at 14% body fat. (It shows the last measurement history)
2. I used it a week ago and found I was down to 9-10% body fat. I have found that I have looked really toned. However, I realize I have barely gained any weight since I lost the 20+ pounds! So it is a good thing that my body fat is really down, but it's going to take some time to get the weight back.
3. I saw a friend from last year and he noted that I was visually much skinnier. I appreciate the honest feedback and plan on getting it back asap. My pants also need belts! I'm mostly upset about that.

I saw my surgeon a few days before so I got some more info from getting some answers.

Elastics - after 3 months+ I don't need them anymore at night!
Jaw widening - when my top jaw is widened, the cut is made from when it is taken out, and filled in with bone, not with putty which I was stupidly thinking. There is bone added to the top part of the top jaw, so you can't see it(just your gums, palate), that's how the gap is filled in.
Contact - I should be able to take small blows for the most part to my jaw. I'm not planning on testing it out, but I can.
Numbness - The time frame is usually 1 year to get feeling back. Nothing I didn't already know, but I couldn't remember if I had asked him about it or not before.

For now I am still seeing my orthodontist monthly for new wires. I saw one of my orthos in traffic the other day and beeped to her and talked for a few brief seconds and I said, "Looking forward to my new wire." Gosh, the weird things I do now.

Quick pic.

Cheers.

3 months have finally past, and 2 knuckles are in with ease! - Day 90 (August 6)

The crazy 3 month mark has been hit. For such a huge process like a jaw surgery, getting here is quite bittersweet.  Why? Because I found it difficult to believe I would get here during my first week of recovery, but now that I'm here it's really hard to take it all in and enjoy it like I had envisioned.

I apologize for posting less and less during these times. If anything, many readers should realize that by this point, life is back to normal! As therapeutic as blogging has been for me, I found that it's easier to do when you have the time. Now that I'm fully functional, blogging has sadly taken the backseat. Life. Is. Back. To. Normal.

Eating - You name it, I've eaten it. Except steak(Saving it for some glorious occasion in the future, tbd). We went to the Keg for my mom's surprise dinner and I had a prime rib, tiger shrimp, and double baked bacon potato; it was effortless to chow down. Eating for the past few weeks has not been an obstacle. And guess what? The food stays in my mouth, sans drooling, and goes down perfectly chewed. The art of eating is now thought free. Huzzah.

Here's a few quick pictures of where I am, the webcam I use is terrible and makes my skin look like I'm sunburned but you can see where my bite is at.

So what does this mean now?

In terms of recovery there are 3 things left:

Range of motion - I can fit 2 knuckles into my mouth with ease, there's no more need to slice bananas into my mouth anymore. My range still needs to improve because I can't fit a subway sub into my mouth, so that's my next landmark for motion.

Swelling - my nose is going down, not as pig like and popped up as it used to be.

Bite - My right side of my top teeth is directly on top of my bottom and it's very uncomfortable at times. I went to my ortho yesterday and he said that through using a stronger archwire, the arch of my top teeth should open up and then go over the bottom teeth better. That means I just have to wait for the newer stronger wires to push that row of teeth out. Once that's done, and the roots set,  I can get my braces off :)

Haven't been this ready to shed the braces for some time, what a feeling.

I'll keep on posting whenever I get the chance.

Cheers.

3rd Last Trip to the OS, and I get the go ahead! - Day 75 (July 22)

 10 Week Post op Pictures.

Saw my surgeon yesterday and got to clear some thing up in our usual 5 minute check up.


Chewing - I don't have to chew up and down anymore, I can basically move my jaw freely(as free as it goes) and therefore grind side to side.
Bands - I don't really have any sort of elastic arrangement anymore. I told him I wear them at night to make sure things move straight and he says that's best.
Exercises - 2 new exercises to work on, now that I'm past 9 weeks +post op

Exercise 1: Isometric: Basically put your fist under your bottom jaw and push your bottom jaw down. You keep your mouth closed so while your jaw is trying to open, your fist keeps it in place.

Exercise 2: Force: From one hand, use your index finger and thumb, force your mouth open, putting some resistance on the joint.

My jaw is still quite sore when I open and close it frequently, so I'll give these some time. Range of motion is coming back, but every week it has improved.

Lastly, I asked him the big question: Can I play soccer?



... he said yes! Knowing Tocchio he's very liberal and has been with my surgery, so he advised with a grain of salt not to go full out. I'm playing soccer this Saturday, I can't wait.

Hey wake up! - Day 68(July 15)

Quick update here.

My lips tingle constantly when they are touched, sending a nerve throughout my chin. In my spare time I will be repeatedly tapping my lips with my index and middle finger. It's completely odd looking in public. I don't know if that speeds it up but it's a developed habit.


When I eat, I get full now, thank goodness. I also didn't overgorge myself like I thought I would because my stomach has been growing slowly. It makes me a slow eater too and when you eat slowly your brain processes the eating and regulates your pace. The good thing is that weight is coming back because my diet is improving, although very slowly. There is a lot less lip biting, however it's been a conscious effort when eating to stop sticking my bottom lip on top of my incisor(I used to pull my lips back with my underbite when eating) which is my sharpest tooth. The damage done to my lip is going to take a while to recover.

Also, when I eat food and it runs down my chin, it's hard to notice. Expect to wipe your chin frequently just anticipating drool and crumbs to be dangling.

Satisfied/4 things from perfect recovery bliss - Day 62 (July 9)

I think it was a day or 2 ago but I am beginning to really warm up to my new profile and the way my smile is turning out. I don't know what helped me turn the psychological corner, but after several times of checking yourself in the mirror after surgery, this one time I thought, "Hey. I like this new look now."

This may sound silly, but I found it helped to not accept the way I looked the first few days after surgery. I just accepted that my face was my face, and to take the puffy look with a grain of salt. Could it have been the swelling going down? The less drool running down my chin? I have just recently taken a shining to its new luster.

However, there are 4 things that are keeping me from feeling tip top about all of this:

1. Braces - Since my smile has been nailed down, I really want to see my teeth in all of its glory. Strangely braces have been part of my life the last year and I didn't feel a need to part with them. With my new smile, I do now. I've been told my teeth look really white under the brackets too. However, this is the one thing I feel can come last.

2. Range of motion in my mouth - Everyday I'm not practicing how many fingers I can fit into my mouth. I'm getting 3 in really tight. I remember when it was just the pinky, then the index finger, then my thumb, then 2 index fingers... Maybe I should have measured this before the surgery? I never would have thought.

3.Numbness - My chin and certain parts of my face are still tingling and not back. Although you don't use your face nerves very often, when you do, you count on them.

4. Playing contact sports - I want to get hit in the jaw again! I was at my ortho on thursday(he finally replaced the wire on the top of my teeth and they are straight again) and when I asked him about soccer/basketball he said that he personally wouldn't risk it and sit out 6 months to a year since the bone is still calcified. This may be the first thing I might break, (the ruling not my jaw) and start playing at least soccer again after the 3 month mark.  I will ask the surgeon next time I see him because I feel so flipping ready to go already.

If these 4 things were taken care of, I'd be back to myself, as if jaw surgery never happened. Then again, these are fairly tall orders and perhaps I am a bit optimistic nearly 9 weeks in. The problem is that at this point I'm doing everything nearly like I could before. My energy levels are up, daily activities are being completed, and I can keep pace with other people at the dinner table now!

I've also realized that my blogging is starting to slow down, so I will get back on it pronto.

I'm putting up this 8 week profile update in the before and after photos.

"You look different" - Day 59 (July 6)

 "You look different." The words that I hear now that I'm starting to meet some old friends.  My count on people that I have talked to/said hi to/had a small conversation with that ended up facebooking me later that day asking if that was me is at 4. They try and pass it off as me getting a new haircut(I did have a mohawk last year), and even suggest braces, at least they try. Actually I have a picture that I took pre-braces as a nice little surprise. I'm jutting my jaw out on purpose clearly aware of my underbite.

Eating - It is great, I'm eating anything now as long as it fits in my mouth. The more you work your jaw, the more it opens. I just had perogies, sausage, and vegetables for dinner and it went down easily. The weight is coming back and I feel great.

Lip biting - I keep doing it and it irritates me to no end! My lip is starting to get cut up on my left side because it will get in the way of my teeth and I unknowingly chow down thinking it's food.

Numbness - My left part of my chin is still numb, and my upper lip as well as that area to the side of my nose still tingles if I gently rub my finger beside it.

Also, I don't want to scare anyone about jaw surgery, but I saw this video and what happened really had me thinking. This boy Justin was to have jaw surgery on June 23/2011. However, based on what somebody posted on his youtube page, he passed away due to medical complications. We do not know what these 'medical complications' are, but they must be definitely very atypical and rare because this was the first time I had heard/read about anything like this. May Justin rest in peace.

"Wait so which brother of Gordon are you?"/Psychological Support - Day 55(July 2)

I've heard that 3 times over my recovery stage so far. Whenever you've forgotten that your face has changed, someone holds a conversation with you for a few minutes and then they ask who you are, and the thought comes back to you. "Oh yeah, I had jaw surgery just recently" and you point to your jaw, it's still me. At the same time, it's fun when your friends don't recognize you, but if it's someone that you see maybe once or twice a year, it's sort of inconvenient to tell them because now you're keeping mental tabs on who's seen the new you and who hasn't. I don't have that brain capacity.

Happy Canada Day on July 1 to all of my Canadian readers. The weather was absolutely gorgeous and I'm sure everyone had a good time in the sun and letting gluttony take over, because I sure did. I thought barbeque would be a challenge, and it didn't faze me too much. Hot dogs for lunch were tackled one bite at a time, the sausage then the bun, and repeat. Dinner was cut up macaroni and cheese with cut up ribs. It was excellent. Cake is also a very easy eat at this point, as things are pretty much normal. I bit my tongue several times, but it was worth it. I think my weight is coming back, I weighed myself and I've gained 4 lbs from my lowest. Calorie surplus is fantastic.

I read a post by a poster:"Apple_F" on Jaw Surgery Blog Forums who posted asking for psychological support. They made an excellent post describing the feelings of someone 5 days post op just looking for a little up. She posts what I feel everyone goes through at one point and I thought I should share it.


"27, female , Cyprus, 2011
Hello,
Today I had a breakdown just after I woke up. face disfigured. It is traumatising. It is day 5. I have had an orthognathic surgery last Tuesday on both my upper and lower jaw. It was 6.30 in the morning. my face is still completely swollen i cant move any parts of my face other than my eyes. You might know the deal. Uncontrollable drooling, pain and stretched skin everywhere, sore gigantic lips, and bruises. The tingling sensation around your face, blocked nose, tongue trapped in the black hole that is your jaw area. The double-triple chin tops everything nicely along with the torn red occasionally bleeding skin at you mouth edges.
Sounds familiar?
The breakdown spark wasn’t just this image for breakfast, but also the feeling of paralysis, the forcing down of medicine and the inability to express yourself. Crying was a very bad idea. Stretching your face even more caused more pain and filling your nasal passages with tears is not going to help. Lips cracked again. This will never go away. Could this be the punishment for wanting change? If I could have music it would be that of a desperate violin.
Can’t speak- cant smile-cant eat- cant feel.
If only the list included “cant see”. Face is disfigured; there is nothing other than greasy hair to remind you of what was there and you can’t help but think…what have I done! I was fine the way I was.
Overall this doent look like what you signed up for. And it’s been 5 days and all the blogs you have seen seem to have recovered infinitely better. 5 days. That means many many hours, or thinking…”this cant be normal”. My surgeon says yes it, what does he know.(?!?) His face is still on.
Other than the very severe cases of TJM most of us see it as an improvement that will make us feel, chew, smile or look better. Coming to accept, admit and shout to the world that “hey I think there is something wrong with my face/me and I am OK with fixing it” is in itself it quite major achievement.
I had previously very loudly spoken against cosmetic operations and was very aware that this could be considered as one. This is why it took me a long to do it .I am now 27. I felt a bit two faced. Like a quad-hiring cyclist or a volunteer asking for a pay rise… It took me a long time to come to terms with it and to accept it as something important and worthy of respect and not just another vain narcissistic seek for perfection.
Seriously, it is really no comfort that before we get to the good stuff , we must step into darkness, that is the scary zone of recovery. Why make it sound better than it is.
“Would the sewage by any other name not smell as rancid?”
It is still this morning so I cant say I am over it. this is my attempt to feel less “special” or to help perhaps someone else experiencing the same emotions. Also I would like to see if all you guys who have had the operation already and have recovered recognise this “state”, have overcome it and are now laughing at me?"


I feel like many of us sort of hit a critical point where we ask ourselves why we did this surgery, and the regret train chugs on. My reply to this was as follows:



"Apple_F,
That's probably one of the most well-written accounts of a day 5 post op I have ever read. The imagery is precisely what I remembered it to be, and despite being nearly 8 weeks post op, it's fresh in my mind like yesterday.
It's good that you take it for what it is, not a change for the vain, but a change for the pragmatic. I am happy for you building up the courage to have the surgery done, because I am aware that many out there don't have it done because of fear. 27 is not old. Far from it.
Things to help you through this:
- You sometimes need to take a few steps back to leap forward. Yes, you were fine before, but you will definitely be better afterwards. Cosmetically the changes will benefit and the feeling of a new bite should only please.
- Surgery is over, you made it through, there are always risks and you passed the hardest part.
- Swelling peaks at 4 days, you're going downhill from now.
- You can always help yourself recover; drink plenty of fluids despite your swollen throat giving you pain. Drinking liquids is better than not doing it, no matter how much is coughed up. There is so much you can work on to improve your state.
- Walk around, don't let the chair get the better of you. Take a few strides around the house and your body will thank you for it.
Personally I found the strength and a smile to get through this but I know sometimes we mentally falter. It's important to just find the sense to pull you through the hard parts, or if not, there's always that great episode of How I Met Your Mother to keep your mind off things."

The greatest thing about this surgery is that everyone is so supportive of others and offer excellent advice. I completely recommend anyone recovering to read these forums as it has helped me get through all of my issues and hardships, big or small.

Post Op Video #2 - Day 53(June 30)

So I had the time to make a quick video. Even though I'm 53 days in I round up to 8 weeks. I probably should have made a video at earlier points of recovery like a week, 2 weeks, or a month but I slacked.

Also saw the OS today and had a 5-10 min quick session with him. I tried to get an idea of the measurements. What I remember is that the top jaw was expanded 6 mm, the top jaw went up 5mm, and the bottom jaw went back 4 mm. There were a ton of numbers that I couldn't remember, but these ones I did. I'll try again later and see if I can get the details.

So far I've just been taking summer school so I have been a bit occupied. Basically I'm trying to integrate myself back into the normal routine. Some things I've noticed:

Opening - I can open my mouth to get a knuckle in, it's been increasing with more and more talking/eating.

Eating -  Can eat tougher foods, having bbq sausage, chicken when cut into pieces that fit into the mouth.

Mouth orientation - I've been biting my lip and tongue a few times when I eat, it's been really annoying, my new placement of my mouth has been playing tricks on my mind.

Numbness - still remains on my chin. Also a little bit on the upper lip, but not as noticeable as my chin numbing.

Exercise - I went to the gym and found myself getting light headed really quickly. Breathing was sort of thrown off, and finding the right breathing pattern was tricky. Working out at the same level I was pre op definitely takes a while. When I ran there, I found that my jaw joint on my left and moved out of place and then pressure built up on my left side. Throughout the whole workout my left side couldn't hear since it was stuffed with pressure. It went away 2 hours after when I moved my jaw around from eating.


If you guys have any questions, keep sending them.

DOMS/Rebracketed - Day 46 (June 23)

6 Weeks post op picture are now in before and after photos.

DOMS -  For those of you who have never heard of it, DOMS means Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness. It usually happens when your muscles are trying to recover from a totally new exercise that has torn the muscle in a way you haven't been used to. It's a good soreness, and it peaks 2 days after a workout. I can barely move my upper body. Be prepared for it after your first workout. Oh, and there's no proven cure to speed it up.

I went to the ortho today and had the bracket on my front tooth put back on. We didn't know if the archwire should be changed since it has the hooks. The hooks are for the elastics and we did not know from the surgeon if I still need to wear the elastics. I see my surgeon next week so we will wait until then(and I will keep on wearing them.) In the meantime I just have a small wire attaching the new bracket to the brackets around them. I can't wait to have my top teeth straightened. It's crazy how teeth will move apart in a short amount of time.

Speaking - I realize my f's w's and v's aren't being well ennunciated because my chin muscle has to pull up to say it and it's still quite numb. Until then.

Jaw joint cracks? - Yawning happens a lot. It just so happens that when I yawn it forces my mouth open farther than it is ready for, so I repress it. A few hours ago I let one loose and felt a crack or snap by my jaw joint. No idea what it was. It was on my right side which pops a lot. I can voluntarily pop my ear on that side, and it's getting a lot of work done throughout this recovery.

Mouth - I can open far enough to fit one knuckle in my mouth. 

Eating - I tackled 2 filet o fish today from Mickey Ds. Not only am I happy I got a quick 800 calories down but it went down really fast. I couldn't fit the whole thing in, so I would rotate biting the top part, then the bottom part. It is fairly easy to chew this late in the game. I'm also noticing that my appetite is coming back slowly. My jaw joint is going to be in a bit of pain for a while but I hope it heals quickly. I find that it gets sore when I open all the way, and then when I close I can feel a small sting of pain. We'll see how it goes.

I'm also planning to make another video soon. I did a pre op and intend on making a post op around week 8 if summer school doesn't get busy.

The Train track is fixed! (Sort of)

Finally back to the gym - Day 44(June 21)

Yesterday was the first day of summer school so I'm going to be living on campus for half of the week. The change of scenery is quite refreshing from living at home for so long.  Class is forcing me to focus for extended periods of time and I am able to keep up. I remember the first 2 weeks I was mentally exhausted at watching a show for less than 5 minutes. It's good to be back in this state. Since I'm living off campus without a magic bullet, grocery shopping came down to these soft foods:

Bananas(can't blend, so sliced into the mouth)
Pancakes(eggo ones that you microwave)
michelinas frozen entrees(meatloaf, macaroni, alfredo)
Canned flaked tuna(eaten with crackers)

I have to say I am decently stocked for food despite my eating disability of a weak jaw and jaw opening of a finger.

Since I'm back at uni with a gym I decided to get a workout in for the first time. I had been anticipating my first trip back to the gym for a very long time. First of all, I got noticeably skinnier and really want to change that back. How did I find it? Mentally I found myself challenged to keep up with my usual reps and sets but I stayed with it. Physically, my body should have coped better. I found that I had lost a lot of strength, dropping down from the weights I used before. It was still a great feeling to know I could take part. One concern I had was clenching my jaw when facing strain. It never happened once. I found that if you keep relaxed and just focus on breathing your facial muscles should not be working hard and therefore my teeth did not touch when I worked out.

Now after workout the most important thing is to make up for the calories burned. Over the past month I have noticed that my stomach is much smaller than pre op. I've found constant eating and eating more times a day helps expand your food tolerance. I was able to put down a michelinas dinner, can of tuna, and 2 glasses of milk. It felt good to eat the normal quantity again. Cheers to bigger meals.

Sunburned - Day 42 (June 19)

Yesterday I had the chance to do some mother - son golf bonding in a company tournament. It was a great time for golf followed by a banquet. Being outside for 5 hours however does not bode well after being inside for so long after these 6 weeks. Wear sunscreen when you start getting outdoors. As much as I've been outside, I've never been out for that long in 30 C weather. I'm now fully cooked on my arms and face, and it looks like I took a trip to Cancun. After golf, the banquet dinner was, interesting.

Salad: I couldn't chew lettuce leafs, they were far too chewy and thin to be ground up. Bread rolls? Politely declined.

Main Course: consisted of a thigh of chicken, steak, baked potato, assorted vegetables. Of the vegetables, a soft baked zucchini and tomato were both consumed with ease. I was also able to eat the chicken in finely cut pieces. The baked potato was the best part, when combined with the chicken and some sour cream it made my day, not the incredible 15 foot putt.

Swelling - hasn't changed much at all, I believe this to be about 90% of what I'm going to look like from now on. My chin feels like it has the most residual swelling at this point.

From my experience, I believe the face goes through a few phases before it heals:

1. Tenderness/bloating - your phase is fresh from surgery and it feels very tender when you touch it. It's also as puffy as your skin is willing to stretch.

2. Swelling goes down - your face still hurts when you touch it, but it doesn't feel like it is exploding out of your face.

3. Numbness/Itchy/Sharp - your face goes through this sort of weird sensation stage where you get these odd itchy feelings under the skin and it alternates with these pins and needles sensations, and in addition a numbing feeling the rest of the time. This is probably the majority of the recovery.

4. Another swelling going down phase.

5. You can now poke yourself in the face and it doesn't hurt. If you press with enough pressure it does, but you can now feel your face without feeling any pain.

6. The area feels completely normal, feeling and everything. I feel like my cheeks are hitting this step.

All in all the chin and the areas directly to the right and left of my nose are the only spots bugging me. My chin especially feels nothing still, and I don't notice any food there at all, which can be embarrassing. I also think my nose isn't as pointy anymore with my upper lip swelling going down.

Muscles - I can move all of my facial muscles very well. However, the fine motor muscles of my lips are still not there. For example I can't buzz my lips like a horse does. I think my smiling is pretty normal at this point.

Speech - I can't enunciate f's, v's, and w's without using a lot of effort. The upper jaw expansion is certainly noticed by my tongue, and it feels a lot bigger.  Talking can sometimes be a lot of effort, even after 6 weeks.

Eating like a Uni student at home - Day 40 (June 17)

 I added a page dedicated to recovery tips. It's pretty much just straight pointers to recovery and things that may help someone adjust themselves for the better. It's very much an ongoing work in progress.

I have very few regrets about this surgery. One of them however is that the chances of me sampling one of the world's greatest foods are at peril. I don't know if I will be fully healed to eat it in time. I am, referring to the limited time only:

2 pieces of breaded chicken over bacon and cheese. Kentucky Fried Chicken has for once in its lifetime served a higher purpose. It's here for a little while longer, I just hope my jaw is fully healed in time to open my mouth wide enough to fit this in. (No, cutting it into tiny pieces is unacceptable.) My recovery is going very well and day to day activities are probably the same to what they were before surgery. The only problem is that my mouth still isn't opening very far and it's still difficult to close down on food. If I try and chew too hard, my ear has a small popping sound in it. My guess is that the joint is not yet adjusted to the new position of the jaw and moves when I chew on something creating any pressure. Here's a picture of my current progress.

As you can see I can just get one finger into the side of my mouth. While there are many foods which can fit into that space, the soft foods are still what I prefer because it's easier on the jaw.  The two foods that I have recently been going consistently with are: Kraft Dinner, and Mr. Noodles. I thought it was a phase during University but it has returned. The benefits of these foods are just unbelievable. The most obvious is that they are soft enough to fit into my mouth when I am starved. The noodles consistently work its way into your mouth when you are in an unsatiated swallowing frenzy of food. In addition to what seems like an endless supply of starch, it's tasty, cheap, easy to make, and easy to modify. That's a bunch of pros. I also haven't gotten sick of it because I've learned adding an egg to mr. noodles near the end of boiling can add a yolk sac to the noodles which makes it really tasty for actual beneficial nutrition. I've also pulled out my old tricks from 2nd year uni and add various seasonings to my kraft dinner like: Montreal steak spice, Roasted Garlic and Peppers, and the taste never disappoints. I guess I will never evade these foods.

Also, if anyone has seen that Adam Sandler movies " Just Go With It" there's a scene where Adam is at a party and talks to Kevin Nealon who's gotten plenty of botox done to his face. He said he can't feel anything from his eyes down and I suddenly realized how familiar that sounded. When he started laughing it sounded like he was making this retarded cat like noise, and when he drank water it ran right down his face. I couldn't breathe after that scene, would totally recommend watching it.